I’m trying to…

Hey Moon, I am here and I alive. I made it through Christmas. I guess. It was like just another day to me this year. I haven’t felt like that since my grandma passed. I am usually so happy for the holidays. I spent some time with my mom’s side of the family for the first time since g-day. It was fun. I enjoy them. I forgot what it was like to play games and laugh so much. I missed you. I looked for you, even though I knew I would never see you. I still haven’t talked to you. I have sent a few responses but nothing very detailed just cordial. I am sorry. I want to talk to you. I want to spend time with you. I just don’t want it to be for a few seconds. I want to be able to finish the conversation we start. I don’t want to be interrupted and not be able to finish. I hate when we don’t get to say a proper, see you soon. I have a lot to say to you. I haven’t been able to really write since I have been down. I will try to get all this out later or maybe even in the wee hours of the morning since I haven’t been sleeping well. I miss you. I think of you often. I am trying to believe. I wish it was easier. I don’t even remember what the tingle is like. That makes me sad. I miss the tingle too.

I hope you haven’t given up on me yet. I need to believe. I need to feel the love. Thank you for your messages they really do help. I read them when things get really dark. I am going to try to get some snuggle time in. I hope you are sleeping better than me. (Not really)

Goodnight my Moon. I love you. I miss you. I need you always.

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2 Comments

  1. I feel so sad reading your posts… I don’t know what happened – but it doesn’t seem good…
    You appear to be trying to live a life… I hope you get over it somewhat…
    Love Sophiax

    Reply
    • Thank you for Ms.Sophiax. I love your blog. I love the ‘love’ you share with your husband and I will someday hopefully find the one who will make feel and treat me the way your honey does. Thank you for your post as well they give me inspiration!! Love the kitty collar too!! You always bring a smile to my day (: ❤

      Reply

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