I love you. I can feel the way you love me. I missed laying in your arms, hearts racing, amazing-ness tingling, feeling a love only US can.

I’m trying not to fight the happy. I’m trying not to fight the good that is tingling through me right now. I’m trying to let the sparkle that has awaken my soul wrap around me without fighting to break free from it. I want to believe that today was real. I want to believe that today wasn’t full of fake, that it wasn’t just your way of ‘shutting’ me up. I want to believe that you wanted needed today as much as I did.

When you are gone it is so hard to let US win the battle. It is so difficult to ignore the racing thoughts that fill the silence. It would help if I didn’t feel like it is a chore for you to spend time with me now. I hate that I feel like I make you spend time with me. I miss when US just was. When the only thing we had to work at was keeping the Amazing to a minimum because the butterflies and breath stealing was too much at times. What an idiot I was to not enjoy every second of Amazing that US shared. Why did I not just shut up and let the fingers wrap around me and swallow me with the tingle and sparkle that only US can produce?

Because I am a fool. Because the two little souls that own my world are worth more than my happiness, so I will stay here, half-happy, half-feeling, half-living, half-alive, with the saddest eyes and a smile only I could fake, without you.

I can only wish that you will be here with me, holding me, loving me, for always.

I love you.

Thank you for today. Thank you for last night. Thank you for not giving up on US. Thank you for making me feel a love like I have never before. Thank you for touching my soul.

I missed you. I hope you are here to stay.

I love you.

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3 Comments

  1. Reblogged this on Can I Keep You… and commented:
    Fuck.

    Reply
  2. Arisa

     /  January 30, 2015

    Beautiful and Heartbreaking at the same time.

    Reply

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