Moment of weakness… pathetic I know.

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I had a moment of panic yesterday morning. I couldn’t remember what you sounded like. I couldn’t remember your voice. I waited until I was pretty sure you were at work and I called, hoping for once that you really didn’t answer,  that at least your voicemail would pick up.

I could listen to your voice, be reminded, and hang up with no harm done. My plan worked.

Almost.

Until you called back and then left a voice mail.

Knives in my heart.

I was then tortured with your voice, on repeat about a hundred times, I was so saddened by how distant you sounded. It was almost like I was listening to your voicemail.

I could tell right then I’d lost you.

You’re gone. Not mine.

And it hurts so fucking bad.