Started this last night… still alive, barely.

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It’s been 6 nights since we’ve talked. By talk I mean you yelling some word, I think it was now, at me and then hanging up. I’m trying to do everything I can to distract myself and make it thru to the next minute.

Nights are the hardest. The silence makes it impossible to forget you. There is nothing to make the hurt of missing you go away.

I’m finding there are a few things that numb the pain or at least dull it. But I doubt there will ever be anything that takes it away. I’m ok with that. If the hurt from missing you is all that I have left of you I’ll take it.

I wonder if you hurt from missing me. If you don’t can you feel the hurt in your soul? Does your soul feel anything? It has to because it belongs with mine and mine is broken and aching.

Oh my God a whole lifetime?!

I’m dying baby….

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