Tomorrow marks 7 days of living without a soul… I want you back but can never have you. Worst feeling ever.

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I used to never escape you. The thoughts are still there, you still race thru my mind but I can’t find you anywhere.

I don’t even see you in my dreams anymore. Even when you left me or didn’t want me in any dream I still dreamed of you.

Now I can’t find you even in my dreams.

It’s like you don’t exist for me anymore.

Now when you are hurt/sad/ need someone it’s not me you want.

You get to go to her.

You get to text her when you need someone.

She’s who you want to soothe your soul.

You don’t even miss me.

I don’t think you even notice I’m gone.

When you hurt I hurt for you. When you’re sad I’m sad with you. I want to reach out to you and tell you how much I love and believe in you. I want to wrap you in my love and take away all that hurts you. I want to look in your eyes and tell you how important and amazing you are.

But then I remember…

I did all of those things, over and over again.

I gave you everything. I tried to show you how you were everything to me.

It wasn’t enough.

You don’t care.

The feelings I have for you will never fade in a lifetime. But I get to live that lifetime knowing that I wasn’t good enough for you. My love wasn’t the love you wanted for a lifetime.

I am not who/what you want.

She is….

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1 Comment

  1. narcopathcrusher

     /  September 5, 2014

    living without a soul? have you made a contract with the devil?
    or you act overly dramatic because of some abusive scumbag?
    and just so you know i don’t follow satanists!
    *leaves with pride*

    Reply

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